Breakups can feel like the end of the world. Having someone that you once shared some of the most happiest moments with walk out of your life, can hurt more than any physical pain.
Your heart drops, stomach remains clenched for what seems like ages, you lose your appetite or overeat, you're "out of it" as you go through the days or months that seem like centuries. lt feels like the only time you get some kind of relief from the pain is during the little sleep that you get after crying your eyeballs out.
It feels like it will never end.
Will it ever end?
Answer: With time and acceptance, it will.
Though not entirely accurate, there is some truth to the saying that "time heals things". While time can heal, the powerful part of healing with time is that it allows you to gain a different perspective on your breakup, thus leading you to accept it and move on.
For some people, time doesn't heal things for breakups. It might be due to a lack of looking at their breakup from a different perspective or refusal to accept their part in the breakup.
The hardest but most important part is to accept how we contributed to our breakup.
The reason why is that it allows us to do different in the next relationship that we have.
Whether it's taking more time to get to know someone to see how they really are, asking different questions, seeing how they react in scenarios that your ex might have negatively reacted, etc., our intuition and wisdom from the experience in our previous relationships, will lead us to make better decisions.
It won't be easy, but like any challenge we go through in life, the only way out of things is through them.
While rebound relationships/sex can help to not feel those painful emotions, it merely serves as a distraction rather than a way to heal.
If we jump from one relationship to the next without ever acknowledging our mistakes in our previous one, we'll most likely repeat the same patterns that we did, leading us to a similar situation over and over again.
Coping with a breakup is an inside job more than anything else. It is easy to blame our exes, but chances are that we also did things that contributed to the breakup and until we accept what we did without self judgement, can we actually move on and grow personally, leading us to a more fulfilling and healthier relationship in the future.
If you're up to it, we'd love for you to share your thoughts in the comments section below.
Thanks for reading. :)