We've all been through that break-up that we swear has never made us feel this much heartache before. The shock to our minds makes us question if we'll ever truly find someone that we can share the rest of our lives with.
While the feeling of heartbreak is very real, it's mostly likely the thoughts of our breakup that are making us feel worse than the breakup itself.
We all cope differently in how we grieve breakups and while we should give ourselves time to process them, we must not forget that no matter how amazing our ex was, we we will meet someone great again.
It's easy to romanticize our ex, especially when the reason that we broke up was due to something that was our fault, but nonetheless, our mistakes don't mean that we deserve anything less than the best in our lives and in our next relationship.
If it was our fault, the best we can do for ourselves is learn from our mistakes and not do it again the next time around because there WILL be a next time around with someone amazing. :)
We fall into the trap of thinking that:
1. There is no one else as great as he was. Our mind at this stage is trying to figure out how to deal with a loss that we may have caused and making our ex appear to be the most amazing person, is our mind's way of righting a wrong.
2. He was perfect and I was not. No one is perfect and that includes the ex! It's always easier to go against and blame ourselves for our mistakes and soften our ex's.
If the breakup was mutual or due to a reason caused by our ex, our minds will STILL make our ex appear to be the most amazing man and make us second guess our decision of ending things.
Either way, while our ex may have been a great person, there are many people in this world just as great if not a greater fit for us.
Remember the breakup with our boyfriend in high school and in college? Yes, we recovered from those and we will recover from this one too!
While our future love lives may seem to be in a haze at this stage, time is on our side here.
As the days, months and years go by we will look back with different perspectives of our breakups and as long as we decide to allow it to make us better rather than bitter, we can smile and know that we are exactly where we are meant to be.